Put yourself in others shoe

Put yourself in others shoe

It is often asked of us to place ourselves into other people’s shoes. This is, of course, a request to see the perspective from the other person’s side, to try to empathise with their view and see things as they do.It is a tactic aimed at helping you to understand where someone is coming from even if everything they do or say jars with you or causes you to feel negatively about them. Ultimately, the aim is not about agreement but about reaching an understanding of what motivates and compels the other person, so that you may find the middle road to compromise, acceptance and perhaps even friendship.Key factors:

1.Listen more and speak less
Sometimes your friend or someone you barely know just needs someone to talk to. It is best to just listen because some people don’t want to discuss it back and forth, sometimes they just need people to Listen, that is it, listen and not say anything because it could be a sensitive subject or they just don’t want a full on conversation

2.Wait to speak
Once they are finished talking, ask them if you can say something, then say that you feel that you have a better understanding of where they are coming from after listening to their perspective. Do not attempt to usurp their memory of the matter or try to make it seem as if your own experience is better, worse, stronger, deeper; instead, acknowledge their experience for what it is and make it clear that you’ve heard and that you are remaining open-minded.

3.Be accepting
Everyone makes mistakes; things happen that are not purposefully wrong but which were out of the person’s control. Most people try the hardest that they can to do things the right way, to overcome obstacles and to be good people. Sometimes the difference between turning “to the dark side” and no longer caring or remaining hopeful and continuing to strive resides in the moment when a person, such as yourself, steps in and says “It’s okay, it was a mistake, you have learned and will now be able to move on.” So, the next time someone goes through something terrible, think first, never make a judgments about their mistakes because everyone makes them. Be sensitive and listen.4.Be kind
Try to practice empathy by imagining what another person is thinking or feeling. Think about a person’s past experiences, as well as their past, present, and future concerns.